Crazy

I’m going crazy but not for you.
Because of you I feel I do know who you are but where we are I have no clue you make me crazy, crazy you.
Never lovers, only friends. This you say. Thats fine, ok. I never plot, you see, to be a lover, friends we stay.
Thats fine, ok.
My prerogative was not as such, I want no more than to stay in touch. Though staying friends has blander ends,
To touch would likely be too much. Thats fine, ok. But why are we acting as such, such that we have a hidden means
To be the things that brings new scenes. I speak so frank, so blunt, so blank. Not a single feeling hidden. A book thrown agape. The chemicals that fly between are saying things I haven’t seen. I don’t attempt make sense of them, I know my brain can filter them. How I feel is how I speak. I love you friend, as a friend. Hurting you has made me break and words spout forth from fingers meek. I cannot yell at you to speak SO SPEAK! I wish, to me, you’d speak. This silence stabs my sides and twists when words your lips speak are so cold and holding hate, its growing old! I cannot feel a single thing when thoughts you bring to me hold hostile my ability to breath. I cannot be saved from you, for knowing you is all I do but happiness we bing to we from daily conversations three, so hold this silence for too long would sure stir me crazy, strong. With tension growing from our words today I fear a bloody outcome near. Just STOP lets STOP whats going on. I love you as a person, strong. You’ve driven me to poetry. Its long, it rhymes, so strong the lines bear on my mind its haunting me to think of me addressing you as less than her, but truly you are dear to me lets STOP, please SPEAK, I’m dying here this silence REEKS! I will not apologize a moment more for your words are what I long for. I will not try to make you see, you are my closes person neigh. Despite the distance you are my grin. My smile and giggle follow close behind, they are less secret. This, you mind. But know right now without a doubt that hurting you has cleaned me out of joy today, of I laugh I play but never with that hint of glee that later will will speak and sing.
Now I know what it is like to be without your energy for a moments time. It makes me feel afloat, without a direction. Just please know that regardless of what you feel about me, as a friend and nothing more, if I ever hurt you, don’t think for one moment that I don’t owe you some sort of explanation. Without your happiness, I cannot expect to be any more than half-empty. You make me crazy, of all different sorts.